Fertility Cycle #3

So as many of you know I am not patient, at all! This infertility is really not fitting into my plan. So we were going to wait until after the holidays for our next cycle. But I just couldn't wait! So we went back to the doctor on Dec 19 and started back to injections on Dec 21. This time she started me on 200 units of follistim. We went back on Dec 26 and I had follies growing but no front runners. My doctor said once again we should consider selective reduction because I may have several if we continue. I prayed and prayed about this and continued on with the cycle and we went back in 2 days on Saturday Dec. 28 and I had 3-4 mature big follies! The doctor said I needed to trigger right away so she gave me the shot right then. She said to come back the next morning for IUI! So our one night stay in a hotel turned into 2 which was more then fine with our 4 year old that loves staying in a hotel. So as I wrote this (January 8) I am in the 2ww (2 week wait). Last time I didn't dwell on it until 2 days before. I have 4 days and they are going so slow! I am praying at least one of those follies hatched into a beautiful egg that was fertilized! 

Well the day is here. And I knew for a few days what the result was going to be but today was the official day. BFN (big fat negative)! I cried yesterday so hopefully today will be a better day. I am sure I will cry some but hopefully not a lot. I ask myself why me? Why do I have to go through all of this? The heartaches when I get a negative. The broken heart when I look into my daughters eyes when she talks about when we have a brother or sister. The broken heart I have when I feel like I am letting everyone down, including my husband, that would love another child, grandchild, niece or nephew. And the heartache I feel thinking about Delainee's future not having a sibling. It is almost more then I can handle. Then I get a message from someone else with PCOS or infertility of some sort and that reminds me why me. Me because I am determined to get the word out. Me because if I can give hope or educate one person I am better off then when this all started. Me because I am stronger then I give myself credit for. What is our next step now? I will find out in the next few days but it is looking more and more like IVF and frankly I think I am ready. It is way more painful financially but has a higher success rate. And more control. So there would be no worry about over producing. The more I produce the better! I wish insurance covered IVF or even a portion of it! I don't know why people can have child after child living off the state but a person that pays to have insurance can't have coverage for a child they can afford! But that is just another subject that could keep me going for a long time! 

That is all for now. Prayers are appreciated! 

2013 Year in Review

January we started the year off at the most magical place on earth, Disney World. We watched the fireworks at Magic Kingdom where we were surrounded by fireworks from all of the parks. It was absolutely magical, and insane! I highly recommend you do not go to Disney World at this time unless you like it crazy! I also highly recommend staying at a Disney resort and taking their shuttles. Total life saver and probably a marriage saver if you go during a crazy busy time like we did! We did have a great time of meeting princesses and seeing a show though. Next time we go, and there will be a next time, we will try to go during a less busy time.

March I went to and Endocrinologist and had blood work (not on the 3rd day like it is suppose to be done) and was diagnosed with nothing. No thyroid problems and no PCOS. I was referred on to Dr. Maud Dorherty who is a Fertility Endocrinologist. I called and made our appointment for 16 weeks from that day! So crazy she has such a wait!

March Delainee also turned 4 (This is the most important thing that happened in March just going in order). We had a birthday party for her with some of our family, her friends and some of our friends. It was a great time. She got way more then she needed and we ate way more cake then we needed! She also got tickets to Taylor Swift for her birthday! We had a great time at the concert with my sister in law and Delainee's cousin. The girls loved it and I did too. If you haven't seen Taylor Swift perform you should she puts on a wonderful show.

May I turned 28. Depressing every birthday I have that we don't have another baby.

July 3rd we had our consultation with Dr. Dorherty. She diagnosed me right away with PCOS and gave us our plan after medical history and talking to us. We were very impressed with her. She is straight forward but is willing to answer questions.

September we celebrated our 6th anniversary. Crazy to think how fast time has gone. We also started our first fertility cycle. And we also had to stop our first fertility cycle with over production. Very depressing to have to give up on a cycle, our first cycle at that.

October was Halloween, Delainee dressed up as Rapunzel for Halloween and we went to our farm neighbors then headed over to Charlie and Millie Hurst's for soup. Delainee absolutely loves Millie so we spend most of our evening there and then ventured on to town to about 4 houses. Luckily we meet up with Grandma White who had a big bag of candy for Delainee so that took up a lot of space in her bag and once we got home we put that together with Grandma Thompson's and well we still have Halloween candy! She isn't huge on candy which is great!

November we did our second cycle and first IUI, which resulted in a negative pregnancy test :( We decided then we would wait until after the holidays. We had Thanksgiving with my dad's family and also my mom's family. And my wonderful husbands birthday just happen to be Thanksgiving this year so I surprised him with a cake. So once again we ate way too much cake before putting the rest in the freezer!

December we had Delainee's school program, finished up dance until January, and Christmas'. First we had Christmas with my family, then David's family, then just us and finally my moms family came to our house. In my last post I said I would put pictures of my trees up so here you go :)

So after thinking about the last year and I have been thinking anyway there are a few things I would like to do in 2014. I am praying we are able to become pregnant in 2014 if not have a baby in 2014. I want to continue to show Delainee how to be a good person, have manners and that things are things. That being said for her birthday this year I am asking family to not buy her a gift. Keep reading :) I got the idea from a blog and I wish I knew which one because I would give credit but I want family to buy an experience rather then a gift. It can be going to a movie, getting a pedicure, going to the zoo, the list goes on and on but nothing that is going to get lost in her mountain of toys. I want this to happen in the month of March so that she gets to celebrate her birthday all month long. We won't do a family birthday party this year just friends. Family can celebrate her birthday with her when they take her for her special day. How awesome would it be to have 6 days celebrating your birthday with family? That would be what she would get if everyone chooses to participate. No matter what I am requesting no gifts from family so I hope everyone finds some time for her. After all she is what it is about not a gift. I am hoping we can do the same with nieces and nephews. Last year we took our youngest niece to the circus with us and I think she had a good time. That to me is way more meaningful then a gift or $. 

So here is to a wonderful 2014! To my PCOS systers and those with infertility baby dust to us all!